Comments, does sexual addiction exist?

This section is for discussing Sexual Addiction in an Adult way.

Comments, does sexual addiction exist?

Postby Andy284 » Sun Feb 17, 2013 11:59 pm

Below is a selection of comments taken from the article on " does sexual addiction really exist??? BBC News.

Having dealt with my own sex addiction thru SLAA - sex love addicts anonymous - am currently trying to help my 79 yr old father. I tracked him having a relationship with a strip club girl, confronted him and realised he was funnelling all his pension, and borrowing more to boot, to save this poor girl from poverty at mum's expense. Yes he really felt he was doing spiritual work, and that's where the illness will take you. Have been unable to get him help, as he refuses to sign himself in for treatment. To me it's an inheritable disease.
Steve Thomas, PA, USA
I agree with the comments that this condition is not an addiction, but it is a strong compulsion. I know I suffered with this condition, and it wrecked my life. Every spare moment was taken up with browsing internet/phone chat lines, purely looking for people, men and women who wanted to meet up for "no-strings" sex. If I couldn't arrange anything it resulted in missing work, driving around all day to known spots where I would end up having sex with other men usually, in toilets, lay bys etc. This obviously has its own dangers, which never bothered me due to my need to get my fix. I realised that I was having this sex for the experience, the person didn't matter I'm trying hard to distance myself from the obvious places/sources that can tempt me, but it is genuinely difficult to control. I am not cured by any means, and I'm relying on a self-imposed cold turkey regime to try and break my habit.
Darren, B'ham, UK
Well said Darren, I'm exactly the same as you, and full of shame with it. I hate myself for it and wish I could do something about it - maybe I am weak and have no lack of control but I'd appreciate some help with it because I have no clue what to do to resolve it. I beg myself to say no but it doesn't work. I guess in 20 years this will be accepted like other addictions but we are the same stupid people who need to learn everything over and over again before we finally get it.
Ian, Bolton
Isn't this just a way for men to try to legitimise their inability to control themselves? I don't see reports of women with this problem. Pull yourselves together and start behaving yourselves - make your mother proud.
Ellen, South East, UK
But what really is control in this sense? It stated that males are more prone - which makes sense. Built into our genes is the desire/drive to reproduce and spread our seed. In anthropological terms, it's our sexual fitness and we all want to be as fit as possible. I don't think they are blaming society at all. If anything, they do have an issue for needing sex all the time. But really - who doesn't? Some are just more successful than others.
B, Utah, US
As women we have hormonal changes that mean at certain times we are 'on heat' and every conversation with a man gives rise to excitement while at other times it's unthinkable. We also have to bear orgasms that take us to the edge of insanity with the sheer intensity of feeling. The end result for us is nine months of discomfort, hours of agony and years of heartbreak. Possibly that's what save us from the 'addiction'?
Anonymous, Surrey, UK
Lots of so called celebrities, high fliers etc claim to have some sort of exotic disease or something wrong with them. Normally the real issue is trying to keep themselves in the public eye. You don't hear of any of them having leprosy do you?
Marc, Perth WA
Of course sex addiction is real. It does not matter how many times I have sex, I never get satisfied or feel that it is the best I can get. It is a compulsion where one can have sex 10 to 20 times in a 24-hour period and still feels the need to have more partners. It is a compulsive behaviour where the need to view adult material, read and discuss such stories to such an extent that such activities dominate ones life - year after year. It is an addiction where ones female partners tell you, day after day, that one must see a GP or a specialist. It is an addiction when all around one are getting angry and fed up with consistent pleadings for more. I think it is more than a 'process' addiction.
A Singh, Reading, GB
If we're talking about addiction in terms of dopamine and serotonin release, then sex can be every bit as addictive as cigarettes, alcohol, drugs and gambling. The need for a 12 Step seems a bit over the top though. Why not just enjoy the ride, if you'll pardon the pun?
Matt McPherson, Edinburgh
I think this is a compulsion rather than an addiction, but that doesn't mean that it can't wreck someone's life. Unfortunately it's becoming a 'trendy' problem to have, so there'll be plenty of people claiming sex addiction to gain media attention or as an excuse for poor behaviour - an action that demeans everyone who's truly got a problem.
KE, Leeds
I think sex addiction does not exist as an addiction, but definitely does as a compulsive disorder. I have had a similar situation with porn. I realised that it was getting out of hand when I felt a need to look at porn even when I wasn't feeling horny. Later I realised that I wasn't necessarily fantasizing about sex with these images either, but perhaps what I really wanted was a cuddle. The whole process dodges the fact that I don't feel comfortable in social situations and as I get older find myself preferring to stay in with the computer rather than go out.

Anon, London, UK
Nonsense; these are just pathetic people trying to blame society on their own weakness and lack of control.

BBC News - 2008
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Re: Comments, does sexual addiction exist?

Postby Martin Black » Sun Mar 03, 2013 1:04 pm

It definitely does exists. I should know. :oops:
Martin Black
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Joined: Sun Nov 11, 2012 3:23 pm


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